Spouses and Significant Others in Magic

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by William Draven, Oct 22, 2009.

  1. Good morning Theory 11!

    I thought twice about posting this here, mostly because I know that we have a younger demographic of users so the chances of finding anyone who's married is fairly slim, but I'm hoping that maybe a few who are in some kind of a relationship could contribute some thoughtful advice or discussion.

    The question is: "What does your Significant Other or Spouce do to show support and stay active in your magic career?
  2. My wife loves watching me perform. She's (understandably) not impressed with the actual material anymore (and she despises being my guinea pig), but she loves the interaction and responses I get from laypeople when I perform. She's very supportive in my pursuit of magic as a full-time career and often hands out my business cards, spreads word of mouth and even helps out in an occasional trick or two when I need an accomplice for certain effects. She's one of the most encouraging women I know. Whenever we go out on dates, she'll often mention whether or not she can visualize me performing in the restaurant at which we're dining. In fact-- last weekend, she encouraged me to perform for a group of strangers while we were out and it paid off-- it resulted in some new friendships.

    The thing I love most about my wife in regards to magic, is that she actually understands my point of view in it. She agrees that magic is an art that should be taken seriously. She's even read books like Derren Brown's Pure Effect and Darwin Ortiz' Strong Magic, and she appreciates the amount of thought and consideration that goes into developing magic as an art.

    She's my homegirl.

    One year anniversary this Sunday. Booyah.

  3. My mom buys me whatever magic tricks I tell her to!
  4. If that was meant be funny,ok.

    But spouse means WIFE. Not your mother.
  5. Unless he's into that sort of thing...........(shakes head in disgust).:)

    My ladies in Texas and I'm in Indianapolis then to Ohio for the next month so I guess she waits for me which is more than I could ask her to do.

    Show business...........:(
  6. My girlfriend (of over a year and a half now) loves that I do magic. She's actually encouraging me in my endeavors of attempting to get a job as a magician for supplemental income (hopefully transitioning into full time in the future).

    She loves magic and actually hates knowing how it's done, so I have the perfect spectator to show all of my stuff. I try not to repeat toooooo many times...but whatever, she enjoys it. (as long as I don't interrupt her when shes reading...) :)
  7. My girlfriend loves to see new tricks, she loves to see new vid's i find of others performing. She even came with me to Magi-fest last feb. and we both met Wayne and his wife. Shawn Faraquar's daughter hung with us all weekend haha. She is actually learning a little magic and flourishing as we go too, taking interest. Its just stuff like the Ninja Card Spring grab, Standard spring, charlier, fans but its still a nice effort. She is amazing and very supportive especially when it comes time for gigs, or teh ever present hunt for a restaurant gig.
  8. That was the reason? Younger demographic?

  9. I'm going to ignore the comment about younger demographic being the reason.

    So here's an interesting thought. Do you feel it's wrong to request your wife or S.O. to NOT attend a show in which you are doing potentially dangerous if not deadly acts on the grounds that you don't want her/him to witness your maiming/death should the off chance something go wrong?
  10. let me ask you this. why are you doing things that could lead to your death or maiming. and also do you think it makes a difference if they are there or not. Say you ask them not to go, the will be sitting at home or whatever, still worried sick, but they wont know if things went well till hours afterward when the show is already over. Now if they are there, yes there is a chance they might witness something, but say you succeed, then they can share in that glory and feeling with you, and say they were there, and know instantly that your ok or not, and if your not, they can be there for you, at a hospital or by your side. I think its better for them to be there, after all you can ask them to simply avert their eyes, as long as they are there.
  11. WTF are you getting yourself into, Draven?

    I don't really believe this applies to me as most of what I do is very close-up harmless magic. The riskiest thing I've done recently was hurt my eye prepping for Wayne Houchin's Thread. And my wife laughed at me. In all seriousness though, if I'm confident in my work and the risk is minimal, I see no harm in bringing my wife to a show where I would be doing something relatively dangerous. Years ago when I was with a former girlfriend, I performed a straightjacket escape at an Independence Day festival, and she thought it was the coolest thing I ever did.

    But honestly... if you're worried about the psychological impact of an epic fail in front of your wife/S.O., I would also suggest you think about the rest of the audience as well and decide if the effect or stunt is truly worth it at all.

    ...Siegfried saw Roy maimed...


  12. My wife is supportive in that she lets me buy almost anything I want effect wise as long as it isn't over $100 for one effect. She gives me advice on my website or patter or business card designs.

    She hates being the guinea pig for new effects or card sleights and is rarely impressed with anything. The first trick I think that floored her where she was clueless was Extreme Burn. She actually loved it.

    She also doesn't like it when we are at a party together and all the focus comes to me and people want me to start performing. It drives her nuts and she will leave the room.

    She does allow me to go to conventions and this weekend I am actually going to a 2 day magic auction here in Ohio.

    As far as danger or times I did not want her with me....hmmmm...can't say I've had an instance. Normally she does not accompany to any gigs as she knows how every effect works and could care less. Ha Ha.
  13. I hope that's a hypothetical question.
    As someone who is married, you have a responsibility to your wife and family to not leave them husband and/or fatherless. It's one thing to be at risk in your work, it's a very different thing to put yourself at unnecessary life threatening risk.

    If one is going to put themselves at unnecessary risk of death, sure bring your wife. You are after all putting all the other people in the crowd in the same position. So if you are going to care for one person by asking them not to come, then you should probably ask everyone not to come....

    hypothetically of course...
  14. My girlfriend (yes, girlfriend) is very supportive of my magic. She's always willing to help me practice and tell me if i'm flashing or whatever else. She finds that i'm a magician very entertaining actually. Anytime i meet a new friend or family member of hers, she says "Oh, and Amanda is a magician". And thenn I have to put on a little show, haha.
    But yes, I find myself quite lucky to have someone who supports and enjoys what I do. :]
  15. This is a hobby and for-fun matter for me.

    However, my wife of almost six years has been very supportive. She practically pushed me out the door to join the local I.B.M. ring, and was more than willing to allow me to set my own budget for the magic auction here in Austin.

    She knows that it's all sleight of hand and trickery, and sees that more than anything else. To say the least, all of it is unimpressive to her. So it's great that she's the first to point out when I accidentally expose something. She's the ultimate killjoy, but in a way that makes me feel proud to have pulled off a successful pass for her rather consistently as of late. Especially after all the time and money invested in learning it, a lot of that time right in front of her.

    She also walked in on me one night with the video camera on and practicing a silk routine. We have a room set aside as a music/painting/photography/general art studio. It looked like she was trying not to laugh while rolling her eyes simultaneously. Other times, especially in the way of some non-card effects I enjoy which require gimmicks, she'll grab it out of my hand grinning like a spoiled child. "Let me see that!"

    I'm sure that's a lesson in crowd management.

    As for danger -- This is a hobby, stress relief, and source of pride for me. Danger would kind of ruin that. But those are also the same reasons for my wife's support.
  16. its hypathetical
  17. My girlfriend (of 5 years) is very supportive of my magic hobby (yes, hobby). She doesn't mind when I test effects on her (she helps point out when I'm flashing, when certain methods or actions lead, in an obvious way, to the method, etc), she's very helpful like that. She doesn't mind that I've spent as much as I have on magic effects, either.

    She's also started to take a liking to actually performing magic (just for me--she doesn't want to even go near an actual audience, heh). She's just doing simple stuff right now, but she's learning.

    And as far as dangerous magic--well, I don't do anything that carries with it a risk of harm (to myself or the audience). However, if I were to, I would definitely want her there. Why? As an added safety measure. For example, say I was doing a Russian Roulette routine. She could give me a sign to let me know if someone tampered with the cups or not, so I know whether I'm in the clear to perform the effect, or if I should bail (through appropriate patter, of course--I wouldn't just end abruptly).

    But, when it comes to genuinely dangerous stuff--I just wouldn't do it, so it's a non-issue. :)

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