OK, I'm going to attempt a Steerpike-style chronological breakdown. My first one, so we're in this together. Hold tight.
0:01 - Do you really want a faceless "um" to be your first impression? I understand that you might find it hard to get a decent shot which gets all the ambitious action and your face in at the same time, but maybe if you were sitting down to begin with so we could see your face, and if you had an opening line to introduce the trick, the presentation would be a lot more engaging. "Um" implies you're improvising. That's fine if you're conscious that you're giving off that impression and the rest of your presentation is congruent with that idea. If this is supposed to be something that you've worked on and perfected then I think a more tightly scripted opening is called for.
0:10 - Why are you holding the cards? And why are we looking at you holding the cards? This first ten seconds could have been performed with your face in shot, with a tight intro to the concept of the effect that you're about to deliver. If you can capture the imagination of the audience with the premise of an effect then that builds up anticipation for the moment you pick up the cards and actually begin. Take time to set the stage and establish the parameters for what's about to happen. For an ACR, the premise could be, "It's possible to invisibly control cards, which is why you should never play cards with strangers...and they don't get much stranger than me. Let me show you what I mean..." or "I used to think it was impossible for one solid object to pass through another but then I discovered this principle. Allow me to demonstrate."
0:21 - If you want them to just name a card, why are you spreading through the deck? You could still be sitting down with your face in shot and without the cards in your hand at this point. The unnecessary focus on the deck implies that the cards are the most interesting thing in the room but surely, the guy who can make impossible things happen is more interesting, aren't you?
0:40 - Does it take this long to have a card selected? This isn't magical or interesting, I'm afraid. I think you should choose whether to make the selection process important or not. If it's important, make sure the participant understands how important it is, e.g. "Now, you're going to make a decision in a moment which is going to determine the course of events for the next few minutes. All you're going to do is think of a playing card and tell me what it is, but whichever card you say, that's the one we're going to use, so make sure it definitely feels right to you." In this instance, though, the point is that it doesn't matter what the card is. So make the selection process unimportant and casual, e.g. "We need to use a card for this. We can use any one so which one do you want? It doesn't matter...just say any card...happy with that?" The fact that the participant changed their mind implies that they felt like the selection was important, probably because all the toying with the deck may have felt as though you were trying to influence them in some way.
0:58 - How does gesturing over the backs of the cards say "that was a free choice"? The emphasis of "this really was a free choice" and that incongruous gesture imply the opposite. If it was really a free choice then you wouldn't need to keep trying to prove it. If I was that participant, I'd now have decided that the identity of the selection is in some way important to the workings of the trick. In other words, I'd have concluded "It's some kind of special card...case closed, no magic to see here."
1:08 - OK, now we're getting to the premise of the trick. This is supposed to be the interesting bit, the hook that draws the audience in but we've already spent a minute on inconsequential actions. Is there any reason why this introduction couldn't have gone first?
1:19 - I don't think this premise really makes any sense. I'd recommend taking some time to script things. The premise IS your effect. Do you really think that the participant will go away and tell their friends, "Wow, you won't believe this. Apparently when you select cards, they become attracted to you!" Or, do you think this is all just noise to them?
1:29 - Why did you put the card on the deck and then take it off again?
1:36 - This insertion into the deck looks very suspicious. I'm sure it doesn't take this long to stick a card in. Also, you're talking but I'm not really sure what you're saying. It's not holding my attention. At this point, what you're saying should be the most interesting thing, because sticking a card into the deck is only interesting for magicians.
2:07 - You keep repeating the same thing. I think you could do with scripting this.
2:18 - Why is it "really cool" that it's going to happen "over and over"?
3:01 - There's no escalation. If you're going to do something "over and over", it should become dramatically more interesting each time. The conflict should be heightened and the obstacles that you overcome should be greater. Otherwise, you might as well have just done it once.
3:25 - Sorry, what's your premise again? The card "knows your name"? How does that help it come to the top?
3:40 - I'm sure you know that colour change could have been executed better.
3:55 - And that top change.
4:16 - So we CAN see your face! Why couldn't we see it earlier? Unless there's some narrative reason why you're remaining anonymous until two-thirds of the way in, it seems theatrically unsound to only reveal your identity now.
4:28 - If your premise is that the card is doing this by themselves, why does this look like so much effort?
5:15 - That slow rise felt like your big finish. This now feels extraneous.
6:00 - Stop saying "um". This is clearly prepared, so should be scripted.
6:20 - You did a face-up pass. Why?
6:34 - Not a strong enough moment to end on. If that's really your big finish, you need to build it up more. We need to understand why this is so impossible. Otherwise it just feels like you took the card out of one deck and put it into the other at some point.