A Short Story About Magic

[James Smith]

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[EJ]

I think this is a good start. I would try rearranging some of the sentences around so that the story flows a lot better. For example, the part about the audience being bored to death should come first in my opinion. That way the reader knows right away what's going on. I would also try to expand on the reactions of the audience as the magician is restoring the torn business card. Try using strong verbs to emphasize the impact on the spectators.

Those are my thoughts. Good story. I look forward to reading your final submission!

 

[James Smith]

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