Magician vs the spectator

[Killjoy]

So I've been into magic for about 5 years (with some breaks in between)
Now, while performing a lot of times there's this kind of perception from the audience that, I am the magician, I am trying to trick them, and they try to catch me. It's like 'ok now you try to trick me and lets see if you can'.
And somehow this usually just happens with guys somehow girls like magic more, maybe it's just that the guys feel as If I'm showing off or something.
So now the question is, how do I set up the frame that I am NOT there to 'show off' or try to 'trick them and make them look stupid' ? I usually tell them just that, and that I'm just there to make them have a good time that's all
Probably my favourite magicians is Wayne Houchin, and I just love the way he presents magic and makes the simplest effects a lot stronger just by making the presentation very entertaining and interesting ^^
How else could I set up the frame that it's not 'me agains them' ? I want it to be more like just 'us and magic'
I know there is no way that I can make this completely go away, people will always be interested in how these things work. but still I would like to hear your thoughts and ideas for presentation/psychology



oh.. and another thing, didn't want to make another thread.
sometimes when I do magic and do the presentation a lot of times people will go like 'oh ok ok, just do the magic' without being interested in the presentation at all.. like when I tell them to imagine something or just think about something they just go like 'yeah, sure,whatever' like they know that that wont make any difference. how do you make the presentation more interesting? another things would be just do more visual stuff ofcourse

 

[Delusional]

Both of the issues above are completely reliant of your personality and the way you interact.
First you need to establish that you're friends with the spectator, then establish that you're a magician. Also, you should try to always perform for women (In my opinion). Most of the time, they are more outgoing and more prone to express their feelings outloud ,ie "Oh my gosh how did you do that!!!?" Men are just as amazed by the magic, but you dont see most of it. They keep it to themselves. But all of us have had plenty of experiecnes with men that freak out.

As far as the presentation problem, they only say "ok get on with it" because they are seeing through the BS. If they see that what you're saying isnt really your own, they will dismiss it. Make your presentation match you, and your style. And make sure your presentation is not boring, but relateable and intriguing. Like,"Have you ever had an experience where...." relate to the audience.

 

[RickEverhart]

You have two valid concerns. The first one is true, you should never feel you are performing magic AT your spectators. If anything, try to allow the magic to happen in their hands. They get to hold the props, cards, etc. Definitely allow them to see that you are their to be their friend and that it isn't a competition to fool them. Any time you can involve a few spectators in making decision and doing the magic it has a better effect than them just watching you perform for them.

Your second concern is that you have to make the audience believe your patter / script even if it is complete BS. Make it relevant to the situation you are in or the environment. If you are at a party and people are playing cards, then talk about how you had an uncle who used to be a pit boss or something and he knew how to catch people cheating at the tables. Then go into a gambling routine or something. "YOU" have to believe your lie as well. It can't be so far fetched that nobody will buy into it. Sometimes telling the truth is even better. Think of true events that you can use as patter that have happened to you.