Please Critique My Video

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Sep 1, 2007
3,786
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Thoughts as they occur to me.

0:01 - What's wrong with your sound?
0:06 - Oh hell, is this just going to be more music, further removing any human element from the performance?
0:09 - Indeed it is. Your hands move way too much. Exercise a little economy of motion.
0:11 - Wait, a second how did we get here? Did you cut the complete middle out of the effect? Jesus... Just because you can edit doesn't mean you should.
0:17 - Amazing. You held the tension for a full second.
0:21 - Show your face, for god's sake.
0:27 - Jesus. Stop cutting.
0:28 - And slow down. Sweet Satan, man.
0:35 - Stop cutting!
0:38 - Stop... cutting!
0:44 - God damn it. If you need an annotation in the video to explain the plot, then you suck at editing. Next time, record actual sound.
0:49 - What just happened? I didn't have time to process any of that.
0:51 - Well, that scene's not working, let's try another one! Wait, is that you on the left? Well slap me in the head and call me Buddha, you actually do have a face!
0:59 - The reactions might have had more weight if I could have actually heard them.
1:13 - Why do you insist on standing like 20 feet away from everyone? You too good to stand next to people now?
1:19 - Apparently you think you're too good to actually stick around and listen to them.
1:25 - Wait, what just happened? What was the setup? Goddamn this is pissing me off. Stop... ****ing... cutting!
1:29 - Home movies are more tightly edited than this!
1:37 - Again, what just happened?
1:46 - This time you actually had the sense to show the card to the camera and some of the set-up, but I still don't know what ****ing card it was.
1:48 - I take it back. You just cut the ****ing setup out again.
1:52 - For the love of George Romero, your audience does not have leprosy. You can stand next to them.
1:56 - And once again, you just wander off like a self-important douche.
1:58 - I'm getting motion sickness from the editing.
2:02 - Stop showing me fans. I don't care.
2:08 - Again, I can't tell what the card is, so it's not like it matters.
2:17 - Once again, you held the tension for maybe a second. No sense of drama.
2:32 - That was even worse because you didn't hold the tension at all. You revealed as soon as they had just finished processing what had happened. Christ, man! Are you really in such a hurry that you can't pay attention to basic things like pacing?
2:35 - That annotation is pissing me off because I couldn't tell what the cards were in several other shots either, and besides that, you shouldn't have to do that.
2:41 - Can you read my mind now? I'll give you a hint. I'm angry at how bad this video is and thinking of several four-letter words.
2:46 - A mind reading effect over in only a few seconds? Are you ****ing kidding me?
2:59 - Another annotation that you shouldn't have needed had your cameraman actually gotten a decent shot.
3:03 - Another annotation that sound would have made completely unnecessary.
3:10 - Stop hogging the damn frame. And why do you keep hunching over like that?
3:18 - Oh my god, there's sound! Too little, too late.
 
Jun 6, 2010
796
0
Nashville, TN
Thoughts as they occur to me.

0:01 - What's wrong with your sound?
0:06 - Oh hell, is this just going to be more music, further removing any human element from the performance?
0:09 - Indeed it is. Your hands move way too much. Exercise a little economy of motion.
0:11 - Wait, a second how did we get here? Did you cut the complete middle out of the effect? Jesus... Just because you can edit doesn't mean you should.
0:17 - Amazing. You held the tension for a full second.
0:21 - Show your face, for god's sake.
0:27 - Jesus. Stop cutting.
0:28 - And slow down. Sweet Satan, man.
0:35 - Stop cutting!
0:38 - Stop... cutting!
0:44 - God damn it. If you need an annotation in the video to explain the plot, then you suck at editing. Next time, record actual sound.
0:49 - What just happened? I didn't have time to process any of that.
0:51 - Well, that scene's not working, let's try another one! Wait, is that you on the left? Well slap me in the head and call me Buddha, you actually do have a face!
0:59 - The reactions might have had more weight if I could have actually heard them.
1:13 - Why do you insist on standing like 20 feet away from everyone? You too good to stand next to people now?
1:19 - Apparently you think you're too good to actually stick around and listen to them.
1:25 - Wait, what just happened? What was the setup? Goddamn this is pissing me off. Stop... ****ing... cutting!
1:29 - Home movies are more tightly edited than this!
1:37 - Again, what just happened?
1:46 - This time you actually had the sense to show the card to the camera and some of the set-up, but I still don't know what ****ing card it was.
1:48 - I take it back. You just cut the ****ing setup out again.
1:52 - For the love of George Romero, your audience does not have leprosy. You can stand next to them.
1:56 - And once again, you just wander off like a self-important douche.
1:58 - I'm getting motion sickness from the editing.
2:02 - Stop showing me fans. I don't care.
2:08 - Again, I can't tell what the card is, so it's not like it matters.
2:17 - Once again, you held the tension for maybe a second. No sense of drama.
2:32 - That was even worse because you didn't hold the tension at all. You revealed as soon as they had just finished processing what had happened. Christ, man! Are you really in such a hurry that you can't pay attention to basic things like pacing?
2:35 - That annotation is pissing me off because I couldn't tell what the cards were in several other shots either, and besides that, you shouldn't have to do that.
2:41 - Can you read my mind now? I'll give you a hint. I'm angry at how bad this video is and thinking of several four-letter words.
2:46 - A mind reading effect over in only a few seconds? Are you ****ing kidding me?
2:59 - Another annotation that you shouldn't have needed had your cameraman actually gotten a decent shot.
3:03 - Another annotation that sound would have made completely unnecessary.
3:10 - Stop hogging the damn frame. And why do you keep hunching over like that?
3:18 - Oh my god, there's sound! Too little, too late.

it's like a Tosh.0 video breakdown! haha
 
Jun 10, 2010
1,360
1
Steerpike, in all honesty.. Do my claims have any weight to them now? Or am I still spouting trash because Mehar is a great magician no matter what we say and I'm just jealous?
 
Aug 6, 2009
27
0
Isn't it just hysterical how this thread went from critiquing Towtox's video to pointing out the flaws in Mehar's?

I also think kittens are cute.

~Andrew
 
Jun 10, 2010
1,360
1
Isn't it just hysterical how this thread went from critiquing Towtox's video to pointing out the flaws in Mehar's?

I also think kittens are cute.

~Andrew

Well, they're slightly related. Both videos sucked and could use lots of advice.

I prefer the Alpaca. Cuter and funnier.
 
Apr 27, 2010
229
0
baller08.blogspot.com
These little kids grew up watching David Blaine and Criss Angel, so in their mind's eye the walking away from the shot and doing tricks in front of the camera seems cool. But without the presentation, audience control, and proper camera techniques, it just looks silly.

It reminds me of when Michael Jordan started taking over the NBA and how his highlights on ESPN actually ruined a lot of fundamental basketball skills in young kids. They started thinking that basketball was only about the flash and never actually realized the amount of work he put into his fundamentals.

Jordan illustrates that in a very well known commercial clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6inUumXJBI

If you look at kids like towtox, he is a representative of today's youths. Makes excuses, wants instant gratification without putting in work, sense of entitlement, gets their feelings hurt at a drop of a hat because adults have cuddled their feelings all their life. It's the result of 15 years of political correctness and "everyone is special, don't say anything negative" mantra.

You guys are wasting your time giving advice to these youtube kids who have no true interest in the art of magic. It's just a flavor of the moment for them, once they realize it takes any amount of discipline and hard work they'll move onto something else.
 
Sep 1, 2007
3,786
15
If you look at kids like towtox, he is a representative of today's youths. Makes excuses, wants instant gratification without putting in work, sense of entitlement, gets their feelings hurt at a drop of a hat because adults have cuddled their feelings all their life. It's the result of 15 years of political correctness and "everyone is special, don't say anything negative" mantra.

S'Truth. Most people don't have what it takes to actually become good at anything. And they wonder why they're unhappy.
 
Thoughts as they occur to me.

0:01 - What's wrong with your sound?
0:06 - Oh hell, is this just going to be more music, further removing any human element from the performance?
0:09 - Indeed it is. Your hands move way too much. Exercise a little economy of motion.
0:11 - Wait, a second how did we get here? Did you cut the complete middle out of the effect? Jesus... Just because you can edit doesn't mean you should.
0:17 - Amazing. You held the tension for a full second.
0:21 - Show your face, for god's sake.
0:27 - Jesus. Stop cutting.
0:28 - And slow down. Sweet Satan, man.
0:35 - Stop cutting!
0:38 - Stop... cutting!
0:44 - God damn it. If you need an annotation in the video to explain the plot, then you suck at editing. Next time, record actual sound.
0:49 - What just happened? I didn't have time to process any of that.
0:51 - Well, that scene's not working, let's try another one! Wait, is that you on the left? Well slap me in the head and call me Buddha, you actually do have a face!
0:59 - The reactions might have had more weight if I could have actually heard them.
1:13 - Why do you insist on standing like 20 feet away from everyone? You too good to stand next to people now?
1:19 - Apparently you think you're too good to actually stick around and listen to them.
1:25 - Wait, what just happened? What was the setup? Goddamn this is pissing me off. Stop... ****ing... cutting!
1:29 - Home movies are more tightly edited than this!
1:37 - Again, what just happened?
1:46 - This time you actually had the sense to show the card to the camera and some of the set-up, but I still don't know what ****ing card it was.
1:48 - I take it back. You just cut the ****ing setup out again.
1:52 - For the love of George Romero, your audience does not have leprosy. You can stand next to them.
1:56 - And once again, you just wander off like a self-important douche.
1:58 - I'm getting motion sickness from the editing.
2:02 - Stop showing me fans. I don't care.
2:08 - Again, I can't tell what the card is, so it's not like it matters.
2:17 - Once again, you held the tension for maybe a second. No sense of drama.
2:32 - That was even worse because you didn't hold the tension at all. You revealed as soon as they had just finished processing what had happened. Christ, man! Are you really in such a hurry that you can't pay attention to basic things like pacing?
2:35 - That annotation is pissing me off because I couldn't tell what the cards were in several other shots either, and besides that, you shouldn't have to do that.
2:41 - Can you read my mind now? I'll give you a hint. I'm angry at how bad this video is and thinking of several four-letter words.
2:46 - A mind reading effect over in only a few seconds? Are you ****ing kidding me?
2:59 - Another annotation that you shouldn't have needed had your cameraman actually gotten a decent shot.
3:03 - Another annotation that sound would have made completely unnecessary.
3:10 - Stop hogging the damn frame. And why do you keep hunching over like that?
3:18 - Oh my god, there's sound! Too little, too late.

This wasn't meant to be anything professional. Me and my buddy had just found out that there was an anime convention in town and thought it would be cool to just do a trick to random people.

Sound - No sound because the real sound will make your ears bleed. You can't hear anything they're saying because the background is EXTREMELY loud.

Music - I though it was kinda cool background music, my bad, I'll find different music next time I make a video.

Editing - I realize it's pretty bad, then again, it is my first time making a video.

Wandering off - I wandered off because it wasn't meant to be a 10 minute show, I was just walking around doing magic quickly to passerby's. Although, I did stick by for a minute longer for some of them. Should I instead do a 10 minute show then talk to them a bit instead? *no sarcasm*

Erdnase Change - I wasn't aware of that 'bending' in my back.

Sabor - I like it when you tell me about people who are out of the frame.

Aaron - My dad did say when he saw the video, that I should use rider back's instead. I have stopped buying custom decks and now just getting Masters (I like the feel and the quality)
 
Jun 10, 2010
1,360
1
Anything else that makes me a ''noob'' sabor?

I love how I was just about to say I had a change of heart about you until you baited me once again.

That being said... I love the fact that you are now switching to Masters. Atleast they don't try and make you look like you're the coolest magician out there.

As for people out of camera... again, better recording or audience placement. Watch where you keep yourself and where they are.

As for magic... Yes, it may not have been anything "professional", but understand that if they are showing you the courtesy of politely watching, you could give them a polite reply rather then walk off like you're all that. They showed you kindness by watching it instead of facepalming and telling you to go away.

As for the Erdnase change.. perhaps you should watch the bending in your back and you backing up. The point of the color change is that it's quick and visual, and how will it be visual if you're hunching over it standing 10 feet away? Get closer, connect with your audience a bit more, and watch your body as you perform. Try and stand straight and don't bend forward or backwards too much, unless it's part of the act.

I'm starting to like you now. You don't remind me of towtox anymore, at the very least. That's a plus for you in my book. Good job, bro.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Sep 2, 2007
1,182
119
31
Houston, TX
Think of it like this (to fix the hunch when you do the erdanase change) you are showing THEM the magic. Do the magic for THEM. It is almost like you are trying to perform AND watch the magic.

Don't be afraid to get close to them and speak to them and really connect with them. Also, if you were up close, it would be more astonishing and less suspicious to them!
 
Sep 1, 2007
3,786
15
This wasn't meant to be anything professional.

I read this as, "I don't have to do a good job, so I won't."

Sound - No sound because the real sound will make your ears bleed. You can't hear anything they're saying because the background is EXTREMELY loud.

Then don't use the video.

Music - I though it was kinda cool background music, my bad, I'll find different music next time I make a video.

Or don't use music at all and instead just try to record decent sound. You could afford a camera. Get a microphone.

Editing - I realize it's pretty bad, then again, it is my first time making a video.

Then learn to edit.

Wandering off - I wandered off because it wasn't meant to be a 10 minute show, I was just walking around doing magic quickly to passerby's. Although, I did stick by for a minute longer for some of them. Should I instead do a 10 minute show then talk to them a bit instead? *no sarcasm*

You could try not taping yourself wandering off like a dick.

Erdnase Change - I wasn't aware of that 'bending' in my back.

Even after watching your own video you didn't notice that you turned into Quasimodo?

You almost exclusively address the technical problems of the video, but you don't address criticisms of your lack of dramatic timing and your bizarre insistence on maintaining about 10 yards of personal space. Do you not believe these to be a problem?
 
Sep 3, 2007
1,231
0
The change looked okay to me. I'd like to see how you can make it better. It's one of the most simplistic changes... Come on Steerpike show us how you can do it better.
 
I read this as, "I don't have to do a good job, so I won't." - I wrote it as: "This was my first time doing this. I did it for fun with a buddy''

Then don't use the video. - Again, I was just bored and wanted to make a video.

Or don't use music at all and instead just try to record decent sound. You could afford a camera. Get a microphone. - It wasn't a professional camera, it was my buddy's old canon sd750. Again, the video wasn't made to be anything ''pro.''

Then learn to edit. - You're really going to say that? What do you think I'm doing when I'm editing this video?

You could try not taping yourself wandering off like a dick. - I didn't realize that it was a 'dick' move, I'll fix that next time.

Even after watching your own video you didn't notice that you turned into Quasimodo? - No I didn't

You almost exclusively address the technical problems of the video, but you don't address criticisms of your lack of dramatic timing and your bizarre insistence on maintaining about 10 yards of personal space. Do you not believe these to be a problem? - I already talked about the 10 yards of personal space. That's not ''personal space,'' I stood that far back because there were people behind me and to the sides.
 
Jun 10, 2010
1,360
1
Bull****. If you're honestly having people that far away to your sides, you're not doing close-up magic and therefore shouldn't have 20 million erdnase color changes on cam. That's when you start to get into stage/parlor magic, and that wasn't the right setting. Know when and where to do magic, and how to ****ing record. Stop making excuses.
 
Sep 1, 2007
3,786
15
I wrote it as: "This was my first time doing this. I did it for fun with a buddy''

Same difference.

Again, I was just bored and wanted to make a video.

When I'm bored, I don't break out my webcam and shoot videos of myself smoking a doobie and writing haiku about peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwiches. Some things are just never meant to see the light of day.

It wasn't a professional camera, it was my buddy's old canon sd750. Again, the video wasn't made to be anything ''pro.''

Again, you didn't think you had to do a good job, so you didn't. All under the tissue thin excuse of, "It wasn't a pro thing." As if professional videographers are the only ones who ever put more than a nanosecond of thought into anything they do. Don't bull**** a bull****ter, kid.

You're really going to say that? What do you think I'm doing when I'm editing this video?

By the same logic, in randomly flailing my arms and legs around I'm learning muay thai kickboxing.

I already talked about the 10 yards of personal space. That's not ''personal space,'' I stood that far back because there were people behind me and to the sides.

Still not addressing the fact that you tip the reveal faster than premature ejaculation. And what the **** are you talking about? Behind you and to the sides? Bull****, you had a space cushion of like 50 feet. You didn't need all that room. What kind of an excuse is that?
 
When I'm bored, I don't break out my webcam and shoot videos of myself smoking a doobie and writing haiku about peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwiches. Some things are just never meant to see the light of day. - When I'm bored I like to make videos of random ****.

Again, you didn't think you had to do a good job, so you didn't. All under the tissue thin excuse of, "It wasn't a pro thing." As if professional videographers are the only ones who ever put more than a nanosecond of thought into anything they do. Don't bull**** a bull****ter, kid. - Yes, you're absolutely right. I did not think I had to do a good job, I didn't expect to be critiqued so heavily, it was meant for fun.

By the same logic, in randomly flailing my arms and legs around I'm learning muay thai kickboxing. - At least you're not sitting.

Still not addressing the fact that you tip the reveal faster than premature ejaculation. And what the **** are you talking about? Behind you and to the sides? Bull****, you had a space cushion of like 50 feet. You didn't need all that room. - What kind of an excuse is that? Yeah, the reveal was early. Bull****? So you're calling me a liar? I did NOT have a space cushion of 50 feet.
 
Bull****. If you're honestly having people that far away to your sides, you're not doing close-up magic and therefore shouldn't have 20 million erdnase color changes on cam. That's when you start to get into stage/parlor magic, and that wasn't the right setting. Know when and where to do magic, and how to ****ing record. Stop making excuses.

Any practice is good practice.
 
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