You know you're a card artist when...

[trashmanf]

...when you're such a fanboy that you don't do anything except cuts and you think that the flourishing world revolves around dbsquared and every thread you start has something to do with Jerrys and you're a tool and you post your "original" cut that got invented over 50 years ago but you dont own the encyclopedia so you post it online and it sucks and it gets lots of props from other n00bs that dont know any better and then I see it and start talking trashman and then you start hatin on me for calling you a n00b even tho you are a n00b and then you enter the trilogy contest but your video only got 1/5 stars coz only one person watched it and that was from your mom and even she flames your video because you used a weird inversion negative-film effect that makes it look like you're flourishing in a petri dish and then you give up cards because you just turned 13 and can finally get into "shrek 3" without a 2nd edition of the legal guardians and you credit brad christensen in a video and you start lots of threads about ellusionist over on theory 11 and you read this whole post and then you edit it because joan and her girlfriends got their panties in a bunch every time you have a lot of crap to say

 

[Jonas]

I got a lot of crap to say

Once again, shut up.

 

[UnholyGodn]

Trashman really needs to stop talking. Some people may not know alot about flourishing, but at least they aren't total idiots and prove it with every post they make.

 

[The Dark Angel]

You often dream of being able to go to the USPCC's main manufacturing plant.

 

[dasuprememep]

If there are cards in a movie, you look for what brand they are. If you don't know, you panic.

 

[Monkeyofmanipulation]

If you try to flourish with everything that can fit in your hand.

if you think about your cards when they are not in your hands....like a lover.

 

[The Dark Angel]

If there are cards in a movie, you look for what brand they are. If you don't know, you panic.

Haha, I get excited everytime I see cards in film or television, because I like to name their brand.

 

[Jordan Lapping]

- ...when the word 'spring' is no longer just another time of the year.

- ...when 'Buck' never makes you think of a Dollar.

- ...when Dribbling actually sounds nice.

- ...when 'Tally Ho' is something more than saying 'Hello'.

- ...when Aladdin is more than a fictional character.

- ...when the most frequently asked question you hear is "Do you play Poker?"

- ...when a standard-sized Bicycle can fit in your pocket.


Just a few I could think up ,
Jordan

 

[Great Scott!]

When you're Singaporean.

 

[arcangeld]

-When shuffling while playing card games you have to stop yourself from doing false cuts
- When cheap assed cards are not handled by your hands anymore
- When you cut cucumbers and watermelons with cards
- When you twirl and toss your handphone subconciously
- When the significant authorities asks you to put away the cards.. you make it dissapear..
- When its 2Am right now, but you are here reading this and playing with cards..
- When you dress as gambit for halloween

 

[andrew713]

When you rape your cards

hahahahahahaha. thats funny.

When you ask to borrow your friends cell phone, then you take out yours and do charliers using them.(did that yesterday) razrs work best.

 

[Sergey]

-When playing a card game it takes 5 of your friends to stop you from shuffling the deck because you have been doing that for like 10 minutes already

-when you call bicycle cards bikes

-When Jerry's Nuggets doesn't remind you of someone's private parts, or some fast food restaurant

-When you are not a fan of ellusionist anymore

-When you get a new deck of cards every 2 weeks
and so on

-When you know who Daren, Richard, and Kevin, and the other members of virtuoso
Good topic by the way it has humour and makes a lot of sense in other words it's funny because it's true

 

[Leon]

When a bunch of guys gather and start playing with their decks

Damn you Jaspas!

 

[UnholyGodn]

-When you get better at False Sybil just so your friends can't complain about you shuffling the cards mid hand.

 

[sourboarder]

- If your everyday job is a dishwasher and get PISSED when your hands are wet so you can't do flourishes while your waiting on more dishes.
- If you are seriously consitering getting the ace of spades on the gaurdians as your next tattoo. (sadly i am guilty.)
- If you bought a $25 membership to sam's clubs for the 13 packs of bikes for $14.99 best deal i've found. Even with the $25 membership.
- For halloween you "magically" produced a treat for the kids.
- If you have tried to make your own magicians wax.
- when you drop one cards doing molecule 4 you do it 20 more times.
- If a girlfriend has dumped you because you left her to do street magic. real short relationship. Oh well.
- If your girlfriend gets mad when you say criss angel or david blaine.

 

[Great Scott!]

- When everyone wishes you were dead.

 

[dasuprememep]

When you get sick of explaining that there is no more future in being a guy who works at a casino, becuase they use machine shufflers.

When you hope for the perfect pass

When you worship a guy with a last name that starts with a "Z"

When a double fire behind-your-back cross-handed king cobra actually makes sense to you.

You love ipod nanos because their length is exactly the same as a deck of cards.

When it starts to make sense why you should buy a card guard/clip

When you can think of more than 50 reasons why you need the trilogy

 

[LingNemesis]

When you love doing flourishes.

 

[The Dark Angel]

When you're guilty of looking into colleges in the Vegas area in order to work at a casino just so that you can be around cards all day. (Guilty)

 

[Jack The Magician]

When you remember this exact same thread posted a day prior, but cannot resist the urge to just ignore it.

When Kryptonite is Superman's best friend.

Cheers,
JTM